OK, I’m not Barbie.
I don’t really like “real”. I try to act like I do. But I don’t. I like “polished. ”
Take, for example, music. Ricky loves live albums. Because they’re “real.”
I don’t. Because they’re not “polished”.
That desire has transended many areas of my life. I don’t like to have people over unless my house is clean. I don’t like to be seen in public without looking put together. I don’t want my kids to act, well, like kids, in public. I don’t want people to know that there are times that I struggle with things. I like to look like I’ve got it all together.
I also tend to be uncomfortable with things that are too “real”. And people that are too “real” - YIKES! I have to watch out for them. They might fling some of their “realness” on me!
So imagine my surprise when I was listening to a Casting Crowns song called “Stained Glass Masquerade” and was overwhelmed with thankfulness that my church has worked tirelessly to create an environment where we don’t have to be fake. We can be authentic. We don’t have to be perfect. We can be, uh, “real.”
We just started a new series at church called SYNC. On Sunday, our pastor admitted he was addicted - to what, well, you can check that out -> HERE. He might need a sponsor though. His wife admitted on her blog that she can’t get enough of celebrity gossip magazines. I’m praying for her. Our Music Director can’t stop cussing. At least he controls it on stage.
I can relate to them. I’m not an addict. I don’t read celebrity gossip and I don’t cuss. OK, I might possibly, occasionally read a page from a magazine if I’m in line too long at the grocery store. Just a page. Or two. Or three. Anyway…
I used to expect church people, especially staff and pastors to act like they didn’t have any faults. I try to act like I don’t have any faults or problems. I used to look at some of the “real” in our church and I’d want to go somewhere else. To another church. Somewhere more polished. Somewhere more mature. That seems crazy to me now. It was the Pharasee in me. It’s so easy to be judgemental, because if you’re judging something or someone else, you don’t have to look inward. You don’t have to admit that you too have weaknesses. You too are not as “polished” as you would like. It’s a distraction.
Our pastor may be addicted, but God has been speaking through him into many lives. Why? Because he’s transparent. He’s real. His wife might like gossip magazines, but God uses her. Why? Because she’s kind and approachable. She’s real. Our music director may have a hard time not cussing, but he has created a worship environment in which the Holy Spirit works in my life every Sunday. Why? Because he’s humble when he approaches the Throne. He’s real.
I’m not going to spill all of my dirty laundry, like I did in THIS post, but I do have weaknesses. Alot of them. I’m not a “shiny, plastic person” like the song talks about. Ok, there, I said it. I’m not Barbie. I know some of you are shrinking back in horror. I’m not perfect. Not flawless. Not polished. I’m, well, real. And I’m glad I don’t have to hide that on Sundays in a Stained Glass Masquerade.
PS - Sorry to Pete, Brandi and Jarrod for calling you out. You all had the juiciest stuff on your blogs!
June 3rd, 2008 at 9:43 pm
love this, it made me laugh out loud! what a group we are when you look at it that way!
June 4th, 2008 at 5:10 am
Thanks Carmen. One of the things I admired about you when I first met you almost seven years ago was your authenticity. It’s funny how doing life with authentic people gives you the courage to admit your weaknesses and shortcoming.
I hate being a living example of Romans 3:23, but I don’t think any of us escape it. Thank God for his redemptive work in our lives!
June 4th, 2008 at 8:45 am
Well, this post hits really close to home for me, as both my husband and I have been really hurt by churches that did not allow for flaws or faults or addictions in its people and certainly *not* in its staff. After much hard work we now live in a place of naked authenticity that I never knew existed before and there is more freedom HERE than there ever could be behind a polished facade. Thank you for this great post, Carmen!
June 4th, 2008 at 3:32 pm
Ok - if you all don’t stop writing about Sync I think I will scream….just kidding. It is getting me so excited about this series! I am like you, I am not looking for people that are perfect…because I am not at all! There is something refreshing about doing life with people who are authentic.
June 4th, 2008 at 9:15 pm
Well said Carmen. I agree.
BA
June 4th, 2008 at 10:30 pm
Hmmm, you mean you’re NOT Barbie!? I thought sure you were! Actually, I’m glad you’re not. I’m not either — flaws too numerous to even consider mentioning abound in my life. I’m not too great at being real either, though, much of the time. I guess I like my mask of goodness (for lack of a better word). Thanks for reminding me that I don’t have to be perfect for God to love me. He can see behind the mask anyway! Thanks for all your reminders.
Love to all.
June 5th, 2008 at 6:28 am
Didn’t Barbie have a cousin or friend of something? Maybe who wasn’t quite so polished and “perfect”? HA!! That’s the one I would like to be. Put together, but not flawless……..how’s that for a description?
This is a great post and very funny - LOVE your humor and honesty. I also LOVE the way our church is so real, so honest, yet filled with the Holy Spirit and life-changing for many.
June 7th, 2008 at 6:39 am
Great post Carmen!
June 7th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
So Carmen,
I don’t have speakers so I cannot hear what your beloved pastor is saying. I will pray b-cuz I know The Lord knows but it always help to speak the darkness out loud so the Light can come forth into that person’s life, ya know?
Anyway if you feel led please let me know what I am praying for and as for his wife, gee I don’t think it’s such a bad thing. I would call that ” Brain Candy”. I like them too, as long as it’s not polluting her life…. Well anyway; if she has felt condemned then He has spoken I just hope it’s people of the Flesh that are telling her she is wrong and it’s Our Holy One.! I will also pray for the man w/ the potty mouth. Old habits sometimes die hard but other times they just go away! Either way this is what God chose for ALL of us to go thru. “In His image we were created”, right? Sorry for the long comment, let me know what my prayers can be if your led to….
June 9th, 2008 at 7:11 am
[...] week behind on the sermon. It never bothered me much except for this week. When I was reading what all of you wrote about Sync and I could not relate. Well, I could relate but I had not heard the [...]
June 9th, 2008 at 8:41 am
I love this Carmen and could not agree more!!